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  • Writer's pictureAmelia Gillis, LMHC

Delete. Delete. Delete...

Have you ever wanted to delete people from your life? Have you ever felt like you wanted to erase the last chapter of your story?

Truth be told, we all have been at the point where we wanted to get the rights to become the editor of our own life. We have the notion that if we could just delete or throw out that one character in our story then the plot would be different. A mental revision means that the pain associated with that person would no longer exist and that erasing the person out of the chapter from our story could mean erasing the pain or anguish they caused.

I have to come to find out that this is far from the truth. Reality is that if we were able to erase that "one" individual or sometimes "few" individuals, then that would completely change the rest of the story. That one person could be the part of the chapter that helps thicken the plot or encourage the hero to step up to the next challenge. Sometimes that person we want to get rid of has the gift of "transformation". Their part in our story is the piece we needed to transform us into the next person we needed to develop into, the hero of our own story.

As a point of reference, I think about the story of Joseph, from the bible. Joseph's story was one of rejection, betrayal, and detours. However, without the betrayal of others. Joseph would have never developed into the man that his detours grew him to become. That of a leader, a man of grace, even one that after being betrayed walked with such character that allowed him to show grace to those who rejected and even tried to kill him. So, the next time you feel you are being betrayed or mishandled, don't try to kill those people off with your words of slander or actions. Think of them as someone who you needed in this chapter of your life, that was positioned to help you develop your character, build endurance, and grow into the person you were destined to become. Relationships are designed to help you die to yourself so that the person you were destined to become can arise. So, change your perspective and be grateful for that person because they are the push you need to help you arise to be the person you need to be in the next chapter of your life.

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